OMI OMI OMI !!!!!

NOBODY, AND I MEAN NOBODY GETS MORE KICKS OUT OF HANGING WITH THE FRITH THAN OMI. OMI OMI OMI!!!!

MMMMMAP

TURN YOUR BACK FOR A MINUTE AND THE FRITH WILL EAT ANYTHING IN SIGHT. IN THIS CASE, THE VICTIM WAS A MAP OF OUR LITTLE HOMETOWN OF DUNDAS, ONTARIO. FRITH ATE MOST OF THE VALLEY, AND ALSO THE TIP OF THE ESCARPMENT. ALSO, SOME OF HAMILTON HARBOUR. BLEAGH.

FOUR GENERATIONS

FRITH, HER PAPA, HER PAPA'S PAPA, AND HER PAPA'S PAPA'S TWO MAMAS. ALLES KLAR?

I'LL EAT MY HAT. OR VICE VERSA.

FRITH IS AN IRISH BABY. SHE IS ALSO A GERMAN BABY, A DUTCH BABY, A JEWISH BABY, AND A LOUD BABY. BUT TO GRANDMA PAT, FRITH WILL ALWAYS BE AN IRISH BABY. THESE PICTURES LOOK LIKE FRITH IS GETTING EATEN BY AN IRISH BALL CAP. FOR SOME REASON THEY MAKE ME THINK OF THAT DRAWING FROM "THE LITTLE PRINCE" :

NAMING CEREMONY

FRITH'S DEDICATION AND NAMING CEREMONY.. SHE WAS SUCH A LITTLE TROOPER, SMILING AND BABBLING THROUGH ALMOST ALL OF IT. EVEN WHEN THE SCREAMING DID BEGIN, SHE STILL LOOKED SO TERRIBLY SWEET IN HER LITTLE WHITE AMISH OUTFIT, SHE WAS COMPLETELY IRRESISTIBLE. THANKS AND LOVE TO HER GODPARENTS TERRY AND NANCY - WE HELD THE CEREMONY IN THEIR WARM AND BEAUTIFUL HOUSE ON THE MOST PERFECT AND PEACEFUL SUNNY AFTERNOON. A DAY I WILL ALWAYS ALWAYS REMEMBER.

HER PAPA ASKS THAT I ADD A BIT ABOUT HOW WE BROKE A BOTTLE OVER HER HEAD (A REFERENCE TO THE FACT THAT WHEN A SHIP IS LAUNCHED THEY BREAK A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE OVER IT AND NAME IT WITH THE WORDS "I NAME THIS SHIP"

FRITHA MY DARLING GIRL, CONSIDER YOURSELF LAUNCHED...

CHRISTENING PANTS

GRANDMA PAT HANGS ON TO UPSIDE-DOWN FRITH FOR DEAR LIFE WHILE SHE ATTEMPTS TO FIT HER WITH FRILLY WHITE CHRISTENING PANTS. A SQUIRMIER FRITH MAMA HAS NEVER SEEN.

UNHAPPIEST OF ALL POSSIBLE FRITHS

THIS ONE MAKES ME THINK OF THIS HIGHLY INAPPROPRIATE CHILDREN'S BOOK :

AND IF THAT MADE YOU LAUGH, YOU MIGHT WANT TO TRY CLICKING HERE

KARNAK WITH THE PEARL EARRING

FRITH WITH HER MINKEY SHIRT ON HER HEAD. THE LOOK REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING. YOU BE THE JUDGE.

BOOGIE

OH GOODY - AN EXCUSE TO TELL BOOGER JOKES! ODDLY, ALTHOUGH THERE ARE SO MANY STORIES ABOUT TELLING BOOGER JOKES, THERE AREN'T ACTUALLY VERY MANY ACTUAL BOOGER JOKES OUT THERE.. IN FACT, I ONLY FOUND TWO..

Q. How do you get a tissue to dance?
A. You put a little boogie in it!

STRANGE BERT

GETTING IN A FEW ZZ'S AT REBEL'S ROCK, THE LOCAL IRISH PUB. IT IS THE DAY OF THE ST PATRICK'S DAY PARADE, BUT THE FRITH IS A LITTLE YOUNG TO APPRECIATE IT. SO WE VISIT KATE AT REBEL'S ROCK INSTEAD FOR SOME YUMMY COLCANNON. KATE MAKES A GIFT OF BERT TO THE FRITH.. WHEN WE GET HOME MAMA DANGLED HIM FROM THE GYM FOR FRITH TO PLAY WITH, EARNING HIM THE NEW NICKNAME "STRANGE BERT". PLEASE DON'T ASK WHY WE CALL HIM THAT.