NIGHT-SOAKED EYES

THIS PICTURE MAKES ME THINK OF A QUOTE BY ONE OF MY FAVOURITE WRITERS WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS - SHE DESCRIBES HER NEWBORN DAUGHTER IN THE DARKENED BEDROOM AS HAVING "NIGHT-SOAKED EYES".. SO TRUE. (OKAY, IT WAS NAOMI WOLFE. SO SUE ME.)

MS WOLFE ALSO DESCRIBES HER BIRTH EXPERIENCE AS FOLLOWS (IT FELT SO FAMILIAR) :

"Nurses wheeled my daughter into the room in a clear plastic box. No longer was she a mysterious queen, but the tiniest, most naked human imaginable. They put her on my stomach. A knitted skullcap covered her head to keep her warm. She arched her head back to look not at me, but at the light. As I looked at her, my drugged-out emotions distant and uncertain, she began her preordained journey and, hand after tiny foot, crawled up my chest, just as in my dream. By the time she found my breast and clung to me like a shipwrecked traveler, I was entirely hers. Though I did not yet recognize that she was mine, neither did I want anyone ever, ever, to take her away."

HUNCHBACK

SITTING ON MUMMY'S SOMEWHAT-DEFLATED BELLY THREE DAYS AFTER CHRISTMAS. DOING A FAIRLY GOOD IMITATION OF THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME. IN A POWDER-PINK ONESIE.

LITTLE OLD MAN

IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE. EITHER FRITH JUST ATE LEMONS, OR SHE IS SPIRIT-CHANELLING GEORGE BURNS. EITHER WAY. FRöHLICHE WEINACHTEN!

IRVING SNOWMAN

THE NAME'S SNOWMAN. IRVING SNOWMAN.. THE FRITH WAXES OPERATIC ABOUT THE LARGE ROUND HAIRY SNOWMAN SUIT SHE IS SUBJECTED TO IN THE NAME OF EXTREME CUTENESS.

AT HOME WITH THE FATNESS

HOME AT LAST WITH FURRY BROTHER FATNESS - WHO REMAINS BLISSFULLY UNAWARE THAT HIS CATCENTRIC LITTLE WORLD HAS CHANGED FOREVER. BRINGING FRITH HOME WAS TERRIFYING. AFTER FIVE DAYS IN THE WARM UGLY WOMB OF THE MATERNITY WARD, THE OUTSIDE WORLD WAS SO COLD AND LOUD, WITH SO MANY PEOPLE IN IT. LITTLE FRITH WAS WAY TOO SMALL FOR HER CAR SEAT. NONE OF HER CLOTHES FIT HER YET. SHE WEIGHED LESS THAN THE BLANKETS MAMA WRAPPED AROUND HER SO CONSCIENTIOUSLY. I FELT LIKE A BIG BUMBLING MONSTER-MAMA, ILL-EQUIPPED TO CARE FOR SUCH A DELICATE LITTLE BEAN.

FINGER FEEDING

THIS IS HOW THE FRITH GETS FED. SHE WON'T BREASTFEED, AND WILL IN FACT SCREAM EVERY TIME MAMA LIFTS UP HER SHIRT, AND STOPS SCREAMING ONCE THE SHIRT GOES DOWN. SO MAMA USES A BREAST PUMP, AND THEN TAPES A LONG SKINNY TUBE TO EITHER HER FINGER, AND STICK THE OTHER END OF THE TUBE INTO THE CONTAINER OF MILK. THEN STICK THE TUBED-UP FINGER IN FRITH'S MOUTH, AND VOILA, SHE EATS. IT TAKES FOREVER, AND IS FAIRLY TRAUMATIC FOR ALL INVOLVED - THERE IS A FAIR AMOUNT OF CRYING OVER SPILT MILK.

THREE DAYS OLD

LIKE A KITTEN OPENING HER EYES FOR THE FIRST TIME. WE'VE BEEN IN THIS HOSPITAL FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE OUR WHOLE LIVES, THOUGHT IT HAS ONLY BEEN THREE DAYS. WE SLEEP ONLY FOR AN HOUR OR SO AT A TIME. MAMA LOVES THE FRITH WITH ALL HER HEART AND SOUL. WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE?

SKINNY LEGS AND ALL

THE LITTLE BEAN LOST NEARLY HALF A POUND IN HER FIRST THREE DAYS OF LIFE. DUE IN NO SMALL PART TO HER FEAR OF MUMMY'S BREASTS. IN HER DEFENCE, THE BREASTS ARE FEARFULLY LARGE.

EIGHT HOURS

ABOUT EIGHT HOURS OLD. SUCH A SWEET LITTLE BEAN IN HER KNITTED CAP. MAMA IS TAPED AND TUBED AND STITCHED UP WITHIN AN INCH OF HER LIFE. DOESN'T SEEM TO BE AFFECTING HER MOOD ANY.

5 MINUTES OLD

FRITH IS FIVE MINUTES OLD HERE - 6 POUNDS, 9 OUNCES AND NEARLY 20 INCHES LONG. THE NURSE OFFERED TO TAKE A PICTURE WHILE THE DOCTORS POKED AND PRODDED. YOU MIGHT NOTICE FRITH IS SPORTING A GREENISH TINT. THIS IS BECAUSE SHE WAS TEN DAYS OVERDUE, AND SPENT THOSE TEN DAYS FLOATING IN A SEA OF HER OWN POO. CLEARLY, IT ISN'T EASY BEING GREEN.

HALLOWEEN

FRITHA'S FIRST HALLOWEEN COSTUME. MAMA'S BIG ROUND BELLY GOT PAINTED UP WITH ORANGE FACE PAINTS AND BLACK EYELINER. THE NEIGHBOURHOOD KIDS THOUGHT IT WAS QUITE FUNNY. MAMA WAS SCRUBBING BLACK EYELINER OUT OF HER BELLYBUTTON FOR A WEEK.

ULTRASOUND #2

NEARLY FOUR MONTHS IN UTERO. SHE IS NOW OFFICIALLY THE FRITH, A LITTLE GIRL. AS IF THERE WAS EVER ANY DOUBT. HER PAPA BOUGHT HER A DRESS WELL OVER A MONTH AGO.

ULTRASOUND #1

THE FRITH IS ONLY A FEW WEEKS IN UTERO, AND NO BIGGER THAN A BEAN. STILL DON'T KNOW IF SHE IS A BOY OR A GIRL. MAMA CAN SEE HER CLEAR AS DAY, HER LITTLE NOSE AND TINY FISTS. NOBODY ELSE CAN. AH WELL.